In the future we'll all be gay
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
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