After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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