i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
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