I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Randomize
