I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
