I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
