i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
