Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
