Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Randomize
