Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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