Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
