Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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