i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Randomize
