sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
