How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize