I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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