Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
