ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
