This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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