Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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