I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
