i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Randomize
