i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
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