There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I am available for nakedness
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
