he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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