I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
as a side note pls kill me
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Randomize
