Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
i think we sleep fucked last night...
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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