is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Randomize
