saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize