Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
