He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Randomize
