Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
