even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Randomize
