Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
