The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
