butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Randomize
