It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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