Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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