She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize
