"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
