I wish life had little blips of pornography
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
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I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
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So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
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