There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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