69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
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