You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize
