This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
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