I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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