You can't special order awesome
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Randomize
