the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Sext me about skeletons
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
