Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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