I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
